The question I'm about to ask is regarding a husband and wife who live together in the compound of the husband's father. The husband is a low income earner and stays in his father's home along with his wife. The couple has two children, both of whom are girls. The husband has other family members living there as well, such as his sisters. The eldest child of the couple is 2 1/2 years old. The husband tells his wife to put on the veil (hijab) on the child, so that the child can become used to it. But when she puts on the hijab for the child, the husband's father tears it, saying that the wife is trying to test his emotions, and that he has the authority in the house and decides what shall take place in it. Furthermore, he said the child is young and that it is not Fard (obligatory) for her to wear the Hijab now, so it is too early. He also wants the couple, especially the son, to obey his instructions or else he'll force them both out of the compound. Meanwhile, the husband's sister, who lives in the same house, has a 5 year old daughter who wears hijab, and the father doesn't complain. When the husband confronted the father and asked him about it, the father said that he knows full well that the sister does not disobey his command. The father said that the couple should have taken his permission prior to putting on the hijab on the child. The permission was then requested at that instance, but he refused. One day, when the wife was going out with the child, she put on hijab on the child and passed by the husband's father whilst he was chatting with a guest. Upon the wife's return, the father called the couple once more and gave them a final warning that he will not tolerate it, and that if they were to insist on putting the hijab on the child (by disobeying his command) they would have to be sent out. The husband then promised the father that he will not put the hijab on the child, but the wife insisted that she will and that this is her deen. The husband came up with the option that instead of wearing the hijab on the child at home, the wife can wait till she's outside and then put it on her. However, the wife refused. The husband insisted that he is using hikmah, because he doesn't want to cut family ties or disrespect his dad, and at the same time he wants to preserve his marriage. He promised the wife that once he stands a better chance to move out of the house by mutual consent and consultation with the father, then all of this will come to an end peacefully. However, the wife refused and said she'll still put the veil on the child. Now the husband doesn't know what to do. 1. Should he move out of her father’s compound (fearing the dad would disown him)? 2. Should he stay there and be patient with the situation till the right time arises? 3. Would the husband be disobeying his father?
The wife is supposed to obey her husband. She is in the wrong here. The father wants to establish his authority in his home and they are obliged to submit as long as it doesn't contradict Islam. His insistence that the 2 year old child not wear hijaab is acceptable. The wife should just back down and obey her husband.< Back to Questions