What should parents ask themselves to successfully raise Muslim children?
It is important for us to try, those of us that are raising children currently or plan to raise children or who have raise children, we need to look back and see how do we fit on this scale? Were we pious parents? Were we righteous parents ourselves that we should wonder why did our children turn out like this? So where did that come from? What kind of behavior is this? Where did it come from? Do we deserve righteous children? Did we make dua’ for our children? Or did we just let things happen as they happen. We didn’t trust in Allah, We didn’t turn to Allah. Were we good examples ourselves in terms of their behavior and were we loving, compassionate and caring? Were we attached to our children or did we deal with them in a detached manner, so our children couldn’t even speak to us. They can't come to us with their problems. We are in one valley and they are in another. Did we educate them Islamically? Did we give them what they needed to be able to understand Islam and to practice it and did we create for them a positive environment? An environment which you could say that a righteous child should be raised in, such an environment. So when we have an unrighteous child in front of us we can say, this was an exception, this is a test from Allah. Allah has put this test on me. We can honestly say that and not really say we have in fact produced this child, we are the ones who created that environment, that negative environment in which the child was raised. And finally, we have to ask ourselves, were we consistent in how we disciplined our children or did we brutalize them? Did they grow up to hate us because when we are upset, we would beat them till they never forget and you tell them you will never forget this beating here. Did we do that? Did we scar their minds or in fact yes, they never forgot and they still look at us and check their heads. What kind of parents were we?
I ask Allah to guide us to understand our responsibility as parents, to raise a generation of righteous children, to not repeat the mistakes that our parents made, that our earlier generation made and that if we made the mistake with one, then we try to correct ourselves with the other. Doesn't matter if one says, but when I was that age you used to beat me for that, you used to do this, well okay, you tell them, I'm sorry. It wasn't really right. I'm trying to do the right thing now. It’s never too late to learn.< Back to Questions